HESWALL SQUASH
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The Club Committee

Universally admired by all of the "ordinary" members of the Club, the Committee are often affectionately & humourously referred to as "turnips", "wasters" or "a bunch of w*****s".

The aforementioned Committee usually meet on the second Tuesday (or possibly Thursday) of each month at 7.30 pm (or possibly 6:30pm) in the Club bar.

We endeavour to post Committee minutes in the Members Area on this website, once they've been approved at the following meeting.

Please remember: HSRC is a member's club, run by the members, for the members. We need you all to help out as much as you possibly can, please drop us an e-mail at play@heswallsquash.com if you can help in any way. 

Any questions?

General questions about the club can be addressed to the club by phoning 0151 342-2817 after 6:30pm or by contacting the
Club President via e-mail at: play@heswallsquash.com

Can YOU help?

If you have any ideas, money, time or skill you can offer to help the club, please don't just sit on your hands and complain about things (admittedly. a popular strategy) - please contact a committee member.  

New ideas are ALWAYS welcome!

Steve Dodd

:-)

Heswall Squash Club Committee Members 2021 - 2022 season

Club President: ​Colin Winstanley

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Colin is under the impression he is acting as "interim" President until such time as we find another candidate.

Despite being a Club member for the past 6 decades and having already served on the Committee for a number of years, Colin hasn't really grasped the nature of the committee family (or "cosa nostra" as we prefer to call it)

To quote Colin's favourite band, "you can check out but you can never leave"

A keen golfer, Colin's real passion is building 1/3rd scale models of mid-19th century Tea Clippers, entirely from used Swan Vesta matchsticks. However,  he is quick to point out that the designation "Clipper" does not refer to a specific sail plan and may equally refer to; schooners, brigs & brigantines as well as full-rigged ships.



Club Treasurer: Jeremy Heywood

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Little known fact: in his youth, Jeremy and his best friend Ted were in a band called "Wild Stallyns"*

Almost unbelievably, a stranger called "Rufus" gave them a magical telephone booth which could transport them both through time. During their time travelling adventures, they met many famous historical figures including Billy the Kid, Napoleon, Socrates, Joan of Arc & even Genghis Khan!

All in all, they had excellent adventures which Jeremy, now approaching his 80th birthday, can look back on with fond memories of his youth.

(* sadly, "Wild Stallyns" never found chart success and disbanded in the early 70s)

Membership Secretary: Brian Parker

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"Membership, membership, membership" is Brian's mantra.

Devoted to the Club membership, Brian is organised, methodical & capable. He loves introducing new members to the Club, processing paperwork, updating membership details, reading up on GDPR & answering endless questions about "can I get half price membership as I'm a "non-dom" with a bank account in the Caymans?"*

A little known fact, Brian auditioned for the famous "I'm a secret lemonade drinker" advert in the 70s but, was tragically overlooked in favour of Elvis Costello's dad. Despite this early setback, he's devoted much of his time to "spinning the decks" as DJ at venues across the North West.

* the answer is "No" BTW...

Bar Officer: John Williams

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"The drinks are on me!" has long been John's familiar catch phrase and of course, he's one of the best loved characters at HSRC.

Having been a keen squash player and member of the Club for literally "donkey's years", there's nothing John doesn't know about managing the bar.

His keen senses and intuition help him judge which social functions at Heswall scream out for "salted peanuts" and which require the more sophisticated "dry roast".

Every social function at Heswall runs smoothly thanks to John, Leah & the bar team.

Bar & Function Room Manager: Leah Barker

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What can be said about Leah that hasn't already been said?   Quite a lot as it happens!

Leah is talented, enthusiastic, hard working, good natured & dedicated to giving all Club members & visitors the best possible experience of using the bar ​& function room.

Often referred to as "the fifth Spice Girl" Leah's short but highly successful career in the music business set her up financially for life (and a few life times yet to come). However, she hasn't let such incredible success go to her head & is just as happy & at home speaking with the general riff-raff & ne'er do wells that frequent the Club bar, even on a Thursday "teams" night.

She truly is a wonderful host.

Ladies' Teams Holistic Healer: Andrea Snagg

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The Ladies of the Ladies' Teams will, literally, follow her anywhere.

However, given Andrea's legendary running talents, the Ladies' better be quick if they do follow her.

It's often been said that getting people to play in the teams can be "like pulling teeth" but we think that Andrea has what it takes (i.e. a large pair of pliers & her foot on your chest)

Armed with persuasive measures (the pliers) & unbounded charm & enthusiasm, we believe Andrea will steer the Ladies' to even greater achievements in the NW Counties Squash Leagues. 

Men's Teams Masseur: Paul Smith

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Paul "smiffy" Smith. A Club legend.

Paul has turned up, week in, week out (for what feels like, forever) to defend the Club's honour in the North West Counties Squash Leagues.


Naturally talented in many sports, at the age of 14, young Paul turned down a lucrative offer from Everton schoolboys which, as it turned out was totally the correct decision as he later discovered a love for all things electrical.

Paul instinctively knows his ohms from his elbow and has forged a highly successful career away from the beautiful game.


Junior Squash Development Guru: An important role waiting to be filled...

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The Future Of Squash, quite literally.

Dealing with raging hormones, insecurities, tantrums, mood swings & very often, tears is probably the hardest but most rewarding job in the Club but if the prospect of dealing with the Mens' Teams is too much, the job of mentoring & developing or young players may be for you..

Please contact the Committee if you feel that you can help.



Social Secretary: Another important role waiting to be filled...

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Being sociable in an unsociable World, not an easy task is it?

When confronted day in and day out by whingeing nay-sayers (easily identified by their well known catchphrase "we tried that once in 1987 and nobody liked it then") a Social Sec needs big shoulders, big ideas & a big personality.

Having said that, one decent event a year would earn undying love, gratitude & admiration from all Club members.

Please contact the Committee if you feel that you can help.
​

Club Secretary: Stephen Dodd

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The boy that never grew up.

Steve spends most of his time taking photographs (it's his job, yes, who knew he has a job?) & trying to avoid anything of a serious or important nature, especially: economics, politics, religion & football (especially football...)

He'll forget your name, your birthday & never buy you flowers.

He loves nothing better the being locked in a small room with an Apple Mac, a copious supply of McDonalds coffee, Brimstage Brewery's "Trappers Hat" and/or Macallan (TBH whiskey of any description) & a family value bag of Twiglets.


For further details, please e-mail play@heswallsquash.com
© Heswall Squash Racquets Club 2023 - admin by spud x
  • Home
  • Room Hire
  • Membership
  • News
    • old news...
  • What's On?
  • Contact Us
  • Teams & Leagues
  • Photo Gallery
  • Video Gallery
  • Coaching Team
  • Wirral Yoga
  • tell us what you think!
  • Court Booking Rules & FAQs
  • Committee
  • Covid-19 Code of Conduct
  • Members' Area
    • Online Booking Info
    • Member Benefits
    • Document Archive
    • The 100 Club - what is it?
    • The 100 Club - RESULTS!
    • Jayne's Ladies 2019-2020
    • Matt's Marauders! 2019-2020
    • Box League Results
    • Archived - Susana's Sisters 2017
    • Archived - Mark's Maniacs 2016
    • Archived - Club Development
    • Archived - Clare's Champions 2013
    • Archived - Le BigFish 2013
    • Archived - Jules' Membership Info 2011
    • Archived - Julie's Angels 2012
    • Archived - Tony's Teams 2013
    • England Squash News